Starcodes November 29, 2019 Heather Roan Robbins

This post-Thanksgiving weekend starts on thoughtful note which can stray into grim determination, great for a family project but tricky for casual dinner conversation. We may want to corner a younger relative, skewer them with tough questions to make sure they’re on the right path and load them with unrequested advice, but that won’t help. If we’re the one cornered let’s take in the love underneath the grilling, and redirect conversation. This seriousness can bring some wonderful revelations if we drop the pretense that we know what another person should be doing and actually approach conversation with true curiosity.

We may also have to drop our urge to schedule for other people. Many people are dealing with major issues in their life this year. It may have taken a lot of coordination to get through Thanksgiving itself, and come this post-holiday weekend, people need to chill. We need room to wander spontaneously, talk we want to not if we don’t, and will not appreciate being managed or manipulated even the name of family fun.

This determination can make black Friday shopping feel like a strategic military event. Instead, consider hiking together or play a real sport and redirect that competition. Make it a green Friday instead and get outdoors. Share old stories and bring out the photo albums. If a conversation starts to get uncomfortable, back off before someone…